Thanks for all the replies. I somehow feel a bit less a failure when seeing that in order to work full time, you need some form of ‘free’ childcare. (be it friends, partner or working compressed weeks etc)

Being ALL IN THIS TOGETHER is going to be exceptionally hard on my family. (It already is – all our x-mass budget went on replacing the washing machine which broke down. We thank grannies for being good Santa).

I am being made redundant and have a perfect opportunity to find a better paid job, but it seems the more money I earn the more is taken away from me. First to go is the child tax credit (even on current salary), then if I earned 5k more I’d lose child benefit. I am working it out that I need to increase my current earnings by 17k gross just to cover loss of tax credit, child benefit and increase in childcare fees. That is somehow unrealistic, so will have to find another way. I just hope that while working reduced hours will leave us with some more money as we need second income to stay afloat.

Once again, thanks for the replies.